1000 Sit Ups and the Art of Sitting and Sleeping With No Skin On Your Lower Back

Hachi, Kyu, Juu

My stomach is killing me!

When are we going to stop?

I look around the room. I do a quick count.

We just hit 150. We should be stopping soon…

Oh no! The count just began again.

Wait, Oh no, Is this, I wasn’t expecting this so soon…

1000 Sit ups

It was around the 200th or so sit up that it finally clicked.

We are going for 1,000.

1,000 is a big number. A really big number. Shoot, I’d say 250 is a big number… And 1,000 is 4x that!

I Can Do This

SAN, SHI, GO…

Around the 350th or so sit up it clicked.

It’s really pretty simple. There are two options.

1. Do 1,000 sit ups.
2. Don’t do 1,000 sit ups.

Neither of the options seemed rather pleasant. It’s as if I was given the option to eat a rock or starve.

Isn’t there a 3rd option?

Nope.

So with that persuasive argument I closed my eyes and thrusted my body up and down for a total of 1,050 times.

Shortly After

It’s a wild thing to do 1,000 sit ups. The strangest of it all was the incredible relaxation I felt after. There is something special about the sit up motion that brought relaxation to my whole body.

For the first time in 3 weeks I was able to sit in seiza without wanting to rip me eyes out.

My body felt loose and relaxed. My mind felt loose and relaxed.

But that wouldn’t last long…

Later That Night

I don’t want to look… But I should look.

I could feel the burning sensation on the lower portion of my back (or upper portion of my bottom if were being a little bit less censored).

I took a deep breath, turned around, dropped my pants and stared in the mirror.

OH MY G–

I had unfortunately left a fair amount of my skin at the dojo.

Double unfortunately skin isn’t one of those things that you just pick up off the ground and tape back on… You have to wait until it grows back.

Which brings me to the art of sleeping and sitting with no skin on your lower back.

The Following 4 nights

For the following 4 nights I was unable to sleep on my back. Which upon initially hearing you might think is rather unpleasant. But it’s not so bad. The biggest challenge was when I would wake up in the middle of the night. Without thinking I would adjust my body to lay on my back.

UTTER PAIN.

Again, and again, and again.

But each night I expanded my knowledge of how to function with no skin on my lower back… Well actually after the first night I didn’t learn anything. Here’s a quick reply of the second night:

UTTER PAIN.

Again, and again, and again.

But by the 3rd night I was a new man! I learned that by placing a small pillow underneath my right knee and bending my left knee and tilting it so it pointed slightly to the left I could sleep on my back.

… Well except when I would wake up in the middle of the night and I would naturally sprawl out.

UTTER PAIN.

Again, and again, and again.

By night 4 I had started to find a strange pleasure in my pain. It was as if I wanted to keep the streak alive. So I slept on my side all night.

But there is more than just sleeping. I also want to present you with some powerful wisdom I gained about the art of sitting with no skin on my lower back.

The Art of Sitting With No Skin On Your Back

Sitting down is one of those things that we all too often take for granted.

I’ll be the first to tell you. Sitting is awesome. It’s wonderful, grand, amazing, and a really important skill.

Up until this point in my life I had considered myself quite the expert in sitting. I mean, I have about 30 + years of experience in sitting.

So when I lost the skin on my upper rear and struggled to sit you could imagine my shock.

Unfortunately, unlike sleeping, sitting on my side wasn’t an option. Therefore I had to develop some other creative measures.

For the first day I didn’t sit. In fact, I didn’t even wear pants. I couldn’t. The burning sensation was too strong and the wound needed open air to heal.

I kept the curtains closed.

By day 2 I still wasn’t wearing pants but I had once again started to use my 30 + years of expertise in sitting.

I would lean forward on my chair while pushing up on my toes. And voila I was able to sit.

This is it. The art of sitting with no skin on your lower back/upper rear.

In Conclusion

You can imagine my excitement when I overheard Andy sensei mention that we might “be doing them again in the summer time”

Now, that I’m a qualified expert in executing the important skills of sleeping and sitting without skin I’m ready to go…

If you have never done 1,000 sit ups you should totally do it. As this post has shown you will have nothing but positive feelings from it afterwards.

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